Well done, everybody! You all exhibit excellent taste in the things and people you dislike. And now, should I ever decide to give a party for all of us, I know exactly what we will not be listening to, watching, or eating. We will avoid Waterworld and keep our eating noises politely to ourselves! And we will be very careful about how we use the English language! (You are truly people after my own heart.) Lurkers may come to our party as well, but don't come crying to us if we have served food that makes you gag or put on your least favorite movie. We had no way of knowing.
And now, I present (Please make a trumpet shape with your hand and do an intro here. No, seriously. I'LL WAIT.) The Random Round-Up!
On Friday night, I was watching Law & Order and the police used thermal imaging to find a suspect, which brought to my mind a Supreme Court case that I used to teach on back in DC, and wouldn't you know that Jack McCoy brought up that very same case to the judge! And I was pretty excited about that! And then I realized that this probably seals the deal on my status as a Hugely Geeky Person. Then again, I was already watching Law & Order on a Friday night, so I suppose the ship of my coolness had already sailed. (In my defense, Amy and I had very hiply and trendily dined out in hip and trendy SoCo earlier that evening. Also, I don't care what you say, the Fourth Amendment is FASCINATING. So there.)
Yesterday, late in the morning, I helped myself to a cup of coffee from the break room. Coffee, which upon tasting, turned out to be very old and very bad. But then I didn't go dump it out right away and I kept forgetting not to drink it and I would take a big gulp and then remember how bad it was but by then it was too late. This happened several times. Sometimes absent-mindedness is not all it's cracked up to be.
In an effort to finally make some friends already in this town, I have joined a community group through my church. And I have my first friend date tomorrow! You know what I mean. The way that when you're trying to make a new friend it feels like you're asking them out and it's all awkward and weird at first. But I got talking with these two girls, one of whom is also new in town and must have said three or four times how she didn't know anyone in town and missed her friends out of town before I finally worked up the nerve to say "hey, if you ever want to do something some time..." So I am having coffee tomorrow night with two women who conveniently for me (see above re: absent-mindedness) are both named Jennifer. I really ought to be able to retain the one name, particularly since I shouldn't have to remember not to drink my coffee.
Normally I buy my cubicle candybowl candy from Office Depot and lo, it is crappy. Which works out well for me since I am not ever tempted to eat it. But yesterday I bought Halloween candy and a pumpkin container for my desk, and I am thinking of requiring the engineers to say "Trick or Treat" before taking any. Then I will guess their costumes. Oooh! I know! You're a math geek! The third one this morning!
(My cube neighbor just stopped by for candy and said all on his own with no prompting from me that it is appropriate that I bought them Nerds. I did not even do that on purpose. I bought Nerds because I like them and they taste like fifth grade Saturdays at The Skatin' Place. Also they had little bats on the boxes and I like my Halloween candy spooky-looking!)
(I am now officially adding "spooky" to my list of favorite words. Which, by the way, also includes gelatinous, malevolent, ephemeral, lovely, frou-frou, skitter, liquid, whatnot, comical, eloquent, and fraught. Also several more that I will think of just as soon as I post this.)
If the guy in the office near me doesn't stop repeatedly and loudly trying out all of the rings on his cell phone, I may just stuff it down his throat. Or tell him that if he doesn't put it away right now, mister, it is going into my desk drawer and he can have it back at the end of the day. And if it continues to be a problem, I will tell his mother that he is not allowed to bring it to class anymore. DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR? Good, now everybody back to work.